Thursday, March 30, 2006

    Learning To Be Liberal - Class 104


    This is the last in the little mini-series on being liberal. All of the traits covered in this and the previous three lessons are really expansions of simple core non-values like being anti-American, no responsibilities, pro-union, anti-competition, anti-death penalty, pro-criminal, anti-military, continued oppression of the poor, anti-freedom, no courage, few values, little morals, etc.

    Fear
    Fear is a motivational tactic liberals love to use and if you want to be a better liberal then you will need to practice this technique. Learn from past and current liberal masters, especially how they direct their statements to induce that motivating fear in order to manipulate the population. One of the more recent is the NSA wire tapping. While it is fact the NSA was to monitor only overseas communications by certain at-threat targets notice how clever fear was used. "Do you want Bush listening to you?" and "The Conservatives are taking away our civil rights!" Sometimes if the fear tactics don't stick then you will have to cover your tracks with some other diversionary tactic. For example, in the above example the fear didn't stick so try to censure the President - who knows, it might work. (No, it doesn't matter what the world thinks about it. All that matters is being liberal.) Use fear to get taxes higher too - fear the children in public schools will suffer without more money. Use fear to promote union-only stores - fear that a non-union store will force the little mom-and-pop stores to close (also rides nicely on the guilt factor too).

    Hide
    Be very careful when interacting with conservatives since they will often counter what you stand for with truth and reality and facts. Unless you have lots of money like Ted Kennedy, John Kerry, the Clintons, or George Soros and can buy people off then it is better to lay low. Even with personal blogs be careful to not disclose your identity - stay anonymous as much as possible.

    Voting
    The position a good liberal has on voting is simple. If a conservative wins an election then say they cheated and/or didn't let the poor vote and/or harassed potential liberal voters. Before elections find as many people you can to vote liberal - register dead people, illegal aliens, felons, anyone that favors the liberal way - the priority is not what is legal or right but to promote the liberal candidate. If potential laws come up that would help identify legal voters (like a national ID card) that would also enforce one person, one vote - fight against it with all your might. Liberal candidates can not get into office without our special tactics.

    Responsibility
    The liberal way is not to be responsible. Always blame conservatives for everything. If something good comes up then turn it into a negative, then blame conservatives. If something like a natural disaster happens blame conservatives and remember the previous lesson to repeat, repeat, and repeat. Our criminal friends are not responsible for their crimes - it's the fault of the conservative society. People are not responsible for taking care of their own kids - make the conservatives take care of them and if they don't - blame them for not caring, make them look as bad as possible. Always care more for the criminal and make them look like the real victims.

    Your Final Test
    For a liberal student there is no test. It doesn't matter if you have learned anything or not since part of being liberal is not to be accountable. If someone tries to test you then whine that they are being racist, or unfair, or sexist, or offensive. Just whine that they hurt your feelings. Blame any deficiency on your parents, on your church (if you ever attended one), on that conservative teacher that keep trying to get you to do your homework, or anyone - just never blame yourself.

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