Tuesday, March 28, 2006

    Learning To Be Liberal - Class 102

    We continue to find real life advice on being a liberal. Many liberals both past and present have made great advances for the cause of the liberal ideology. As you become more committed to the liberal way it is important that it replace any previous ideas of good and bad you might have once known.

    Liberals love the issue of illegal immigration. As a good liberal you will welcome anyone that wants to come to this country illegally, especially Mexicans. Like the picture above, taken just days go in Los Angeles, Mexicans feel this is really their country and they intend to take it back - so why not help them? Make sure they feel oppressed. Make sure they see that America, as it is ruled now, is the enemy. They will convert to the liberal side, no worry there. If anyone takes a stand for law and order just call them racist, and then they will most likely feel guilty. Remember, use the guilt card as often as possible. Never mention "illegal" when talking about aliens - make it appear that conservatives are against immigration in general. (See "Spin It" below)

    It's ok to say you are associated with certain religions or philosophies. It is really better not to be associated with a religion, but if you feel like it, then just say it is the philosophical part, not the religious part. Don't identify yourself as being committed to anything. A safe one might be Taoism or other Asianism since most people in the USA won't really care and at the same time, you can appear "spiritual" to some degree. It would still be good if you pick some verses in the Bible to try and sound like you know what you're talking about, even though you really don't. Always try and make Christians feel guilty using their own Bible - sometimes it works, especially in combination with that old guilt card. Appearances go a long way.

    Spin It
    Learn to spin all good news from Conservatives into the negative. For example, if the jobless rate is the lowest on the planet your spin will be that the jobs are low paying and poor quality. If the good news from Conservatives is more people own homes than ever before your spin would be to refocus people on how many poor don't have their own homes (include the millions of illegal aliens in your numbers). If the good news from Conservatives is the number of private and charter schools are on the increase and more disadvantaged children are attending then you should play the guilt card and spin that one as the Conservatives are abandoning the public school system and how they need to give the system more money than ever before. Spin it. If there is a job change in a conservative administration, call it a shake-up. Spin it baby, spin it!

    If you went to church when you were young forget all you were taught. Morality has no place in liberalism. Being liberal means we endorse most anything. Heck - if homosexuals want to appear just like normal people then they should be able to marry. Be in favor of reducing the concept of marriage to just a piece of paper, thereby removing it as a foundation of morality. Be against attempts in the public schools to teach abstinence-only sex education since such a practice promotes moral responsibility.

    Return to class for Liberalism 103 tomorrow!

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